


(un)fitting pieces of a puzzle

by LinaxLight (domilesl)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, DarkFlower, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, Height Differences, Height Kink, Mutual Pining, Redeemed Ben Solo, Rey Needs A Hug, Rose is depressed but unaware, Rose needs a hug, TW: mild eating triggers, ben and rose ftw, no reylo HEA, post TROS if Ben lived, read tags before you think this is a reylo fic, rose can handle her alcohol, roselo, tw: depression
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:26:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23906152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/domilesl/pseuds/LinaxLight
Summary: Rose Tico is now a Senator in the New Senate following the fall of the First Order. She's assigned a bodyguard, the former Jedi apprentice and Supreme Leader Ben Solo. She assumes their worlds cannot be more different until she realizes that their stories of heartbreak connect them in ways no one else can relate to. A budding friendship that can turn into so much more than either realize.
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Rose Tico, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 34
Kudos: 35





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hello yes i wrote this in a couple of days because I could NOT keep this story out of my head. I usually only write Reylo but this one needed to be different. Only 2 chapters, I had to split it up because it's a long one, folks. I hope you enjoy! I love seeing any kind of Roselo fics out there, whether its crack or friendship based. Feel free to drop down your fav Roselo fic in the comments!

She’s not really sure how to feel about her bodyguard. 

It’s funny, honestly. She always thought the first time she had him to herself that she would give him a piece of her mind. That somehow her petite little body would elevate to his height and give him a good slap to where his scar was before Rey healed it. Similar to how she assumes a mother would chastise her child. 

Now, Rose is under his shadow everywhere and it makes her uneasy. Even though it’s been almost a year since he was assigned to her. 

She concludes it’s because he indirectly tried to harm her. It’s been only a couple of years since the war ended but he was  _ literally _ called the Supreme Leader for quite some time. Surely, it’s normal for her to still be a  _ little _ afraid of him? He’s quite the tall man—exactly why he was deemed fit to be her personal “overseer” to the Senate meetings. Senator Rose Tico was popular among the majority, yet the loud minority caused enough worry for Leia and the rest of the New Senate to think a security detail assigned to her would prove beneficial. 

One look at the brute strength the man Ben Solo exuded was enough to scare even the nastiest of voices away. 

They don’t ever interact outside of the formal necessities. He gets her to the Capital safely, and gets her back home safely. The only lines of communication open between them consists of holochats and the occasional holomail. 

At times, she desperately wished she had Rey as her security detail. The pair weren’t close, not at all, but their interactions at least proved to be warmer than whatever Ben provided. He could be switched out with a K2 unit and Rose would be none the wiser. The two couldn’t be more different. 

They’re currently stationed at the little outpost hotel before reaching Cloud City. His room is directly in front of hers. Rose just finished a long day of floor hearings at the Capitol so she’s pooped. Per habit, Ben examines her room before she goes inside. They bid each other a good night once he’s done inspecting. 

She is expected to get up at dawn for the Absolution Law vote. This was the law Rose was fighting so hard to get passed—the very thing so many like her were passionate about. It would allow incorrectly imprisoned individuals to have a fair trial if they could prove the First Order influence didn’t allow them another choice than to commit the crime. 

She would be lying if she said that Finn didn’t influence her choice to go forward with the notion to introduce the law. He was there when she first thought of the idea all those years ago when they were on their way to Canto Bight. She almost wished he was here with her now.

But things are  _ weird _ . She misses Finn—it's hard not to. However, the distance between them allows her to think a little bit more clearly than when she’s around him. Although it’s been almost two years, she’s barely begun the process of getting over him. Her heart has moved on from the prior hurt that plagued her for months. But lying to herself about the sting that remains does her no good. She tries hard not to think about it at night, but images of him and Jannah together leave her empty.

Of course he’s oblivious—he’s always been like that. Even before when she knew about his obsessions with Rey and Poe before he did. She just thought they were natural due to him not having any prior relationships in the past. It took some time for him to realize his fixation on them wasn’t romantic love. 

It almost gave her hope. 

Until she woke up and he acted like nothing between them ever happened. After the war, he came back home as a general and with another girl by his side. 

It could be worse, she supposes. 

She’s lying in bed sulking, fiddling with the Leia-like buns on top of her head when someone knocks on her door. Rose opens the door to find Ben hovering on the door frame, looking exactly how he did earlier in the day.  _ Does he have pajamas?,  _ she wonders. 

“Senator Tico—excuse me for interrupting your sleep. But we need to leave now.” He stops to reassure her as the alarm in his voice clearly startles her. “No need to worry, you’re safe. But the Senate moved up the vote. If you want your say, we gotta move fast.”

Rose, clearly aware of her current state of dress, crosses her arms across her chest as she’s trying to process everything he's saying. “I don’t understand, I didn’t hear anything from anyone yet. Are you sure?”

She can tell Ben is resisting the urge to roll his eyes at her. “Yes, Senator. They’re hiding it from you on purpose. I wish I had time to explain how I know but—“ he waves his hand around the air dramatically, “—I think it’s more beneficial if we move.”

Rose sighs and mutters something along the lines of  _ yeah right that force thing you have _ , and moves to get out of her pajamas in the fresher, leaves her Leia buns on, and gets moving.

*

Her dramatic entrance onto the Senate floor is something she will forever hold dearly to her heart. 

The doors opened dramatically and she swooshed passed the audience and older gentlemen as she made her way to her post. 

The sheer look of panic across the minority party leader’s face was her own personal victory. 

In celebration of the passing of her first initiated law, Rose is sitting outside the garden behind the Capitol building looking up at the stars. She knows that Paige is proud of everything she’s accomplished so far. That Finn is also proud, whether or not he’ll make it explicitly known to her. And the congratulatory call Leia gave her—nothing will quite make her glow with pride after that. She smiles, laughing quietly at how crazy her life has gotten. She can’t wait to tell Finn everything. 

Except that when she does, Jannah will be there too. And she’ll be happy for Rose like the good friend she is. Her small laughter settles into a sigh. 

The sound must have interrupted whatever thought Ben was having because Rose can hear his body straighten out against the bench he’s sitting on behind her. Sometimes, she forgets he’s around. He’s also quiet and gives her plenty of space. It’s like having a shadow who is too afraid to get close. She turns around from her sitting position in the field of flowers to observe him. 

He’s wearing all black, of course, and has his weapon next to his belt. The suit he’s wearing is reminiscent of what she’s seen Master Luke Skywalker wear during his younger days in old propaganda. Ben isn’t wearing gloves for the first time since he’s been around her. He removed them so that they sit next to him. 

“Credit for your thoughts?” she timidly asks him. 

Ben looks up, his brain lagging at the attempt to converse with him. It’s the first time she’s addressed him without a significant purpose attached to it. “Nothing interesting.” He cringes a little bit at how sad he sounds. He clears his throat in an attempt to mask whatever emotion is plaguing him. “I want to congratulate you on your win. You should be happy.”

Rose gives him a small smile. “Yeah, I should.” 

“But you’re not.”

She frowns. “What do you mean?”

He stares at her blankly. “Seriously? You’re practically screaming your emotions at me right now. You’re very emotional.” He states so plainly. 

Rose scoffs in offense. “Remind me to warn you before I have the audacity to feel emotions.” She turns back around to face in front of her. Stupid man. She’s not emotional. 

After a moment’s beat, she turns back around. “Wait—have you been able to... _ sense _ my emotions this whole time?” she inquires. 

Ben gives her a small chuckle. It’s the first time she’s heard him make any other noise than talk. “If you’re worried I’m looking through your mind, rest assured I can’t.” Rose blows out a small breath in relief. “However…”, he looks up at her with the smallest tinge of emotion she can’t register, “whenever you feel like  _ that _ , you project very loudly. Kind of hard to ignore.” 

Rose just stares. “Huh. Well.” She moves to get up and brushes off the grass off of her dress. “I apologize for doing so. I’ll try to keep that reigned in a bit.” Kylo attempts to give her a small smile. “I’m heading to bed. Thanks again for your heads up, I would’ve lost without it.” She waves goodnight to him and passes him to reach the door. She’s about to push inside when she hears him call out her name. 

She turns around to see Ben looking at her intently. He quirks around his mouth, as if he’s trying to figure out the right thing to say. “I meant it. You should be happy tonight. You got a big win. Get some rest.” With that, he does a small salute to return to the goodbye she offered him earlier. She nods her head, and sets off to her room. 

It’s only when she’s closing her eyes later that she realizes it was empathy that Ben was looking at her with. 

*

The next couple of days consists of excited chatter that the Core group was arriving to finish the last of the new formal hearings to establish the new Senate. The old dried up Senators had chosen their successors, and they were to be approved by the Core group. The group consisted of Rey, Leia, Finn, and Poe. As generals, co-generals, and the last Jedi, it was imperative they were there to ensure no chaos ensued. 

Naturally, Rose is on edge. She’s never prepared for the way her heart betrays everything she reminds to herself not to do. The minute Finn envelopes her in a hug, she’s trying not to smile too widely, to not hug him harder, to not cry when she sees Jannah come up behind him and join in on the hug. She greets the others more formally and briefly, but she doesn’t fail to see the way Ben holds Rey a little tighter in their hug than he has in the past. 

She throws him a curious glance, and he catches it in time before she’s able to hide it. He doesn’t address it though, and moves through the rest of the group offering a handshake. 

Rey and Ben. It’s no secret the two of them have some stuff to work out. 

They look incredible together. She’s only managed to see both of them in action together a couple of years ago when they fought for the same side for just a small time. Their force and strength were one to outmatch.

Outside of that, they were just  _ beautiful _ . Rey flowed with light wherever she went, engulfing everyone in it. It's no secret that Ben is more secretive and darker in nature, but he is a handsome fellow. Their beauty in nature and body made everyone around either obsessed or uneasy. Even years after everything, the two seem to just  _ make sense _ . No one argues with them when they’re together. She doesn’t know the force, but she knows everything seems to hang in equilibrium when they’re together.

But things between the pair never moved forward. Whether it was unrequited love or the force making it impossible for them, the pair separated any chance they could. Ben was working for Rose and Rey was working for Leia. She thinks it’s unfair to her to say Rey seems to be unaffected by their separation. But even now, she talks to him like nothing ever happened between them. Like two buddies reconnecting after one took a vacation. 

Ben on the other hand...has his days. There’s days where his presence doesn’t go noticed, her assistants in the Capitol separating some space between them on work days. Then there’s other days when Ben’s mood seems to influence their surroundings. Clouds roll in and storms come. The meetings become more tense. Her assistants shy away and stay back.The term coincidence cannot be overstated. 

They would always be connected. They had a special bond in the force. But Rose is a little saddened to know that is the end of what they could become. 

But at least her love life isn’t the only one in the gutter, she admits with some guilt.

There’s a small party thrown for the win of Senator Tico’s law passing, but Rose wishes everyone would just leave her room. She could care less for Poe’s presence and his friends, but she laughs at their jokes anyways. She wants to escape every time Jannah goes up to her with enthusiasm spilling out of her about how much good Rose has done for everyone with the new law. She especially wants to hide from Finn, who looks for her to talk about his future plans with Jannah and if she knew any Senator that Rey could possibly be interested in. 

At one point, Rey takes Ben outside on the balcony for a few minutes and everyone tries their best to pretend they’re not remotely interested in that conversation. 

The party dies out and everyone but Ben is gone. She’s grateful at least one person who works for her stayed around for the cleanup, even if he's still technically working. Her assistants proved too drunk to make it past the door without crashing into it, so she can’t really blame them there.  _ I wish I were wasted _ , she muses. There’s a comfortable silence that settles between the two—she finds she never has to adjust to it in order to be less awkward, and she’s grateful for that. It’s sort of their own rhythm. 

So it boggles her mind when Ben starts trying to strike up small talk with her. 

He tries to be sneaky about it at first. 

It starts off as little requests like “Can I put this back here?” and “Is everything clean over there?”

She knows something is up when they finish taking out the last trash bags containing all the leftover food and party supplies. He falters in his steps as they make their way back to their respective rooms. Rose also halts to see what captured his attention. 

They both analyze the scene before them. In the corner of the main lobby, there’s a small cantina meant more for loners who pass through the late night hours. There’s only one bartender and about three men who have passed the “dozing off” state of influence and entered a snoring competition. The bartender, a K2 unit, seems to be perfectly content listening to their sounds as it continues to polish glasses. 

She thinks that Ben can probably use a good amount of alcohol tonight. He’s been on duty for just over twenty hours due to the party. She’s about to relieve him and say goodnight when he turns around to throw her a wry smile.

“Want to forget about tonight?” He offers with a hint of mischief in his eyes. 

She really couldn’t want anything more. 

*

It starts off with simple questions.

The small talk at first doesn’t go anywhere after a few tries. So, she changes it up. She assumes it’s the liquid courage in her blood. That the juice and spirits mixed together in her chalice are what enabled her to ask the dumbest questions to Ben Solo. 

He quirks an eyebrow at her. “I’m sorry, what?”

Rose downs about another half ounce of her drink. She’s throwing all caution to the wind tonight. “Is this not an appropriate question to ask?” she challenges him back.

Ben ponders over her reply for about a couple of seconds. She’s asked a couple of ridiculous questions so far, but this might be his favorite. He hums in amusement. “No, I suppose not.” He rakes his hand through his wavy hair, the humidity of the outpost taking control over its texture. “I guess I have to say I would rather kiss someone with hands for feet than someone with feet for hands.”

He seems to have answered correctly because Rose grins and cheers him before finishing off the rest of her drink. She doesn’t hesitate to ask for another round. 

“How about you?” he asks, grimacing as he feels the burn of alcohol trickling down his throat. 

Rose is already downing the rest of the drink she just ordered. Ben raises eyebrows in awe. Little girl, strong tolerance. 

She wipes her lips with the back of her hand in a fluid motion. “I already answered the question.” 

Ben pressed further. “I know. I meant to ask...how are you?” 

Rose eyes him warily. “What’re you doing?” Ben starts making a sound of protest back to her but she shushes him off before he can go any further. “Why are you asking that?” She doesn’t mean to sound accusatory but it comes out anyways. “We’ve been around each other for almost a year and now we’re having drinks all of a sudden.” 

Ben waves to the K2 unit for another drink. He fixes his chair so that he can turn to look at her head on. They’ve never had this much eye contact before—he usually hates what he finds when he does this. But he seems to be searching something within her, and Rose feels exposed. She doesn’t like it either. 

“Rey asked me to keep tabs on you.” He finally says. 

_ Rey? _ “Okay, I’ll bite. Why exactly does she care?” 

Ben catches the drink the K2 unit slides over to him before it falls off the edge of the bar table. He tinkers around with the cup before answering, “She just wants to make sure you’re okay.”

Rose stares at the inside of her empty glass. She should really ask for another glass if she keeps this conversation up.

“I don’t appreciate you being a spy for her.” 

“Think of it less as a spy activity and more of a wellness check.”

She laughs bitterly, a clear sign that she needs to stop drinking  _ like now _ .

“Last time I checked, my well being wasn’t her concern so I’m not sure why Rey is so bothered by it now.” She gestures that she’s ready for another round. 

Ben pinches the bridge of his nose, a sign of frustration she’s starting to pick up on. “Fuck me”, he mutters under his breath. He downs the rest of the drink and draws in a deep breath before continuing. 

“Finn and Jannah are getting married. Tomorrow.” Groaning a bit, he continues. “They were going to surprise everyone. Rey found out and told me earlier at the party.” 

The silence that follows seems to stretch out for ages.

And the closest feeling she can identify is  _ mourning. _

She’s in mourning. 

The sad truth is that she isn’t mourning a lost lover, because they never were lovers. But the “what if” will continue to haunt her. What if she never lost consciousness and stayed awake through the whole battle on Crait? What if she didn’t let Finn go with Poe alone on adventures? What if she took his offer to go look for the wayfinder together?

She’ll never know. 

She doesn’t register what’s happening until she feels a pair of hands steadying her shoulders. They shake her out of a haze that seems to lift at once. Snapping back into reality, she notices they’re no longer inside the cantina, but back in the garden from a couple of nights ago. Her legs must’ve carried her out here. Ben sees comprehension dawning on her face and he lets go of her. 

Ben places his hands on his hips and holds her attention, reminiscent of a scolding mother. “Listen. I’m not here to babysit you,” he snaps rather coldly, “I only told you because Rey believed you should know.” He lets his arms go lax by his side, softening his tone a bit. “I’m sorry—I know this...sucks. But I didn’t want you to be caught off guard.” He gulps thickly, careful not to let any emotion spill out. “Not like that. It’s not fair.” 

Instead of the burst of tears Ben is expecting, she starts laughing. It’s definitely those drinks she had. There’s no other explanation. 

Ben is clearly startled. It starts off as a small chuckle, but turns into an outright belly laugh. It’s edging on becoming a little hysterical. She’s holding her stomach with one arm and using her other one to keep her upright as she leans on her knee. 

“I wasn’t—I,” she tries to get out through her laughter and drunk hiccups, “I wasn’t expecting that today”, she finally gets out before engulfing into another round of laughter. 

She looks at Ben, who is staring at her with trepidation. He’s trying to school his expression in a neutral one. She knows he’s close to cracking when his lips start quirking upwards. She pities his efforts and lets him know before she laughs again, “It’s okay, you can laugh too.” He starts to laugh alongside her, not as heavy as she is, but not a chuckle either. 

They must look like a pair of mad men. 

They’re in a field of flowers, during the late hours, laughing at something not even remotely funny.

Their fit of laughter eventually dies out though, and they find themselves laying down in the grass side by side. 

She turns her head to her side to examine him. She’s never taken the time to appreciate his help during her time as a Senator so far. She’s assumed he’s always been just doing his job and he has, but tonight has proven a bit more than that. He didn’t have to try to get her mind off of things. She realizes now that he must’ve known that she probably would’ve reacted differently if she was sober. 

“You’re staring,” he comments, his eyes trained to the stars above them. 

Rose turns her head back to stare at the falling stars above them. “Thank you.” 

He doesn’t have to ask what she’s referring to. “Don’t mention it.”

“Does it get better?” Rose asks quietly. 

She doesn’t have to clarify here either. He inhales deeply, careful to let it slowly as he ponders it over. “No.” He deadpans. She rolls her eyes. “But—it doesn’t get worse. Time helps, if that’s any comfort.” He gets up from the ground and extends a hand out to help her do the same. She takes it, feeling oddly at ease, and lets it go as they make their way back to their rooms. 

She wonders if he feels as lonely as she does at night. 

He opens her room door first to examine the room like usual. She stands there in front of him, feeling a bit awkward. She wants to let him know she appreciates his help tonight. That he didn’t have to worry about her outside of her safety. 

Something he said earlier strikes her again. He mentioned that Rey told him about the news, Rey wanted tabs kept on her, and that Rey believed she should know about Finn and Jannah. But he also said that he didn’t want her to be caught off guard. 

She glances at him. Who knew her bodyguard had a soft bone in him. 

He’s about to disappear off to his room when she stops him with a hand on his shoulder. “I know Rey wasn’t the one who was worried about me finding out. I actually think she told you not to say anything in fear of what I could do or say, right?” 

“I never was a good liar”, he groans, trying to contain the blush that threatens to expose him, sheepishly smiling. 

Rose chuckles softly. “For what it’s worth...I think we’re more alike than I thought.”

Ben looks a bit taken back. “How so?”

She chews on it before replying. “Emotions unite people. It united me and Finn for a bit. It united me to the Resistance. It’s what unites my people.” She squeezes the small hand on his shoulder. “I think ours is heartbreak.” 

He doesn’t reply, merely offers her a small smile. They bid each other goodnight again, for real this time, and set their alarms for the awaiting celebration of the next day. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They don’t say a word to each other as they close their respective doors. Their eyes do all the communicating here. 
> 
> Heartbreak speaks a thousand languages after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *whispers* I changed the second part and had to update the chapter count, don't @ me
> 
> Some mild trigger warnings this chapter: depressive mood and eating
> 
> Note: this is obviously not a huge fic because the roselo ship is not popular, but this is by far the most theuraptic and fun fic I've written. It gives me so much joy, and has helped me focus my thoughts a bit better. If you like it too, please feel free to comment below.

[ ](https://ibb.co/nDTqWWd)

Cloud City was a great spot for a wedding after all.

The gaseous city, outlined in hues of orange and purple painted the sky as the perfect backdrop for a union ceremony. Fiddling with her black dress, Rose’s desire to run out seems to spike as the night grows longer. The gorgeous view is only making her feel a bit more melancholy. The now united couple are getting ready to do their first dance together. She hopes she can be brave through it.

The breakfast earlier was filled with chatter from everyone except Rose. She tried to pretend it was because of the night before—even though she fell asleep a bit more faster than usual and she actually feels quite rested—but she knew from the stares that people knew about her inner turmoil.

Some were even surprised she showed up.

Rose is also surprised, but only that she didn’t show up half drunk off her mind to the ceremony. She gets it now, when Ben told her that emotions roll off of her. She once heard Rey explain the force as an energy that breathes in every living thing, giving it its power of life or death.

Finn is as blind as ever today. She supposes this could be the one time she’s grateful she’s invisible to him. He leans on her as a friend all day, asking her for favors, hugs, and opinions. Rose starts to wonder why the Maker is giving her such punishment in her life. She tries hard to not break the mold of her poker smile, hopes that the cracks of her heartbreak aren’t seeping through.

Rey is also being Rey today.

She’s never been so grateful for having Ben as her bodyguard. Rey has tried to hover over her. Ben, bless him, has intervened on multiple occasions to distract Rey. Perhaps Rey thought Rose would be dumb enough to ruin Finn’s day with a pathetic love declaration. She can’t deny that she hasn’t imagined that. The idea never fully manifests in her mind though, probably because Rose doesn’t even know what she would say to Finn.

Other than that he was the first one that looked at her like she meant something. 

Rose rolls her eyes inwardly. Her whole dilemma is pathetic, she knows. And she’s a bit hurt by Rey’s intensive care. And the docile looks everyone is throwing at her. Especially since it’s not out of a place of genuine care for Rose, but for Finn. This is his special day, and she doesn’t want it to be about her. She doesn’t want their pity or a speech about how  _ it’ll get better, you’ll find someone one day. _ She knows they means well, but--

Rose just wants her sister back. 

She wants Finn back. 

He comes to her rescue again during the after party. If Ben notices the way she’s trying to sneakily wipe away the tears from her cheeks, he doesn’t mention it. He hauls her from her slumped form in a chair, ushering her away from where Finn and Jannah are finishing their dance.

She’s starting to get used to his presence now. Before, it was intimidating. Not just because he was Kylo Ren before, but because—well, he’s just  _ big _ . Her mind traces back to instances where she’s hidden behind his figure. He easily covered her petite figure. She often felt irritated when he did so, because she couldn’t see past the mountain of the man in front of her. 

Today, she just feels safe. 

She idly wonders if Ben is being affected today to any degree. It must not be easy celebrating a day of love when he’s equally heartbroken too. 

He leads her back to her room and turns to head to his room. They don’t say a word to each other as they close their respective doors. Their eyes do all the communicating here. 

Heartbreak speaks a thousand languages after all. 

*

It’s only a couple of months later when the news reaches Rose. 

She’s genuinely happy for them.

It was foolish of her to think Finn would delay starting a family. Jannah and Finn were deserving people worthy of starting a family. After all they've been through, this would begin to set things right for them. Finn would be a wonderful father, she knew that. He was  _ good _ . Inherently good and wholesome and his children would love him dearly.

Even if they weren’t hers. 

She’s grateful for her loaded schedule that week. The distraction is a welcomed one. Everyone is wary at first, trying to see if she’ll take a day off to recover from the news. She trudges on, because she has to. She can’t let her people down. And thankfully, everyone stays out of her way about it. They seem relieved that she’s moved on. Her assistants admire her bravery, gushing to her how strong she is. 

She doesn’t feel strong. She feels weak. It’s been over for more than two years. And yet, the sorrow and heartbreak come fresh every morning and linger every night. Was this just how things will be from now on?

She hopes she finds out sooner than later. 

Her mood gets lower as the week finishes. She’s on her way to her room after a long meeting, walking slowly behind Ben. He usually gives her no space when she follows him, often waiting in mild patience for her to keep up with his long strides. But today, he must be sensing her mood, and gives her a few feet to linger behind. 

Her routine is pretty simple. Work, eat, sleep. She doesn’t feel like eating tonight though. She truthfully can’t remember the last time she ate. Any food that’s been brought to her at work, she respectfully declines. The traitor of her stomach does a loud growl in the moment, shaking her lightly from her thoughts.  _ Maybe some food won’t hurt tonight _ .

They get to her room and he goes in and searches thoroughly for a few seconds before determining the room is safe for her. He’s about to close the door behind him but suddenly stops. He turns back towards her and squares his shoulders together. 

“Let’s have dinner.”

*

“I’m not starving, Ben.” Rose pipes up her voice over the loud music after he orders her another plate. 

She feels like she’s about to burst. She’s eaten practically twice as much in one sitting as she’s eaten in a month, but Ben can’t seem to get a hint. He merely rolls his eyes, and points to the new plate of food being set on her table. “Eat”, he orders. 

Grudgingly, she picks up the plate and begins to eat. 

Damn, it’s good. 

He does a bad job of hiding his smirk when he sees her eating with gusto again, for probably the fourth time that night. If the food weren’t so damn good, she would fling some of it onto his stupid black sweater. 

The cantina tonight, loud with a band playing and its audience cheering them on, should be annoying to her. But she can’t really seem to mind tonight.

Rose is really close to burping with a sheer force she hasn’t felt in a while when Ben interrupts—

“I stopped eating too. I don’t want the same for you.” He sips on his water glass, his eyes not totally focusing on her. “That’s how it starts. Better you realize it now before it gets worse.” 

Rose, full and sobered up, simply nods and finishes her food. 

They leave quietly after.

She thanks him that night. As he goes to shut her door, she sticks her hand out to stop him. He sees her rub her tummy, now overly full and content, and gives him a small smile. Ben can’t help but smile at her goofy gesture, and nods in return. 

Rose goes to bed that night thinking about how her bodyguard slightly blushed for the first time around her. 

*

Politics has so many downsides to it. 

The arguing, the late nights, the exertion, and the drama of it all was nothing daunting to her. Rose could deal with it. In fact, she welcomed the struggle. Everyone in the Senate now has been reassured that Rose is not one to back down. It’s probably getting to the point where Rose is going to have to get a talking to from the Core group, specifically Leia, that she stops purposely looking for fights. 

She loved her job. She would do anything for her people. 

But she wished this wasn’t part of the job. 

She knew it would come eventually. She would be foolish to not think so. But, she figured she wouldn’t be alone in this. To face this embarrassment together with someone else. 

Curse the Maker and everyone who made politics adhere to these ridiculous rules. 

The annual gala for charity awareness in the Capital was today. The planning took months to get together, specifically the deciding of a budget and which charities were allowed to receive aid. The Senators played a big part today. Each of them were linked to a specific charity. Rose chose a charity that helped look after orphans affected by the wars. People would pay for a dance with them in order to raise funds.

How delightful to Rose, who had no desire or idea how to dance. 

She’s not even sure who would pay money to dance with her. She was popular with her people, but it was the older folk who could secure a dance. Old money ran high still to this date, and she doubts her newer constituents had deep pockets like them. Casting a quick prayer to the force or whoever could hear her that it wouldn’t be some musty old man, she began to go over her agenda for today. The gala was straightforward—show up, dance, raise money, and leave. 

Amazing how all her hard work of being in politics and making change would boil down to a simple dance party. 

She swears she’s gonna outlaw it by next year. 

The ultimate purgatory comes when her assistants come to her room to begin the assembly of her presentation. Her hair, her clothes, her skin, her smell—all of it gets manipulated by these younger souls that seem to take joy in doing these things. They giggle at her, saying  _ I bet you’re going to raise the most money tonight,  _ and really, she thinks her night can’t get any worse. 

They grab her and lead her down to the senate floor now turned ballroom. Rose, covered in a red fiery dress, equally flowy enough for movement and stiff enough for structure and safety, stands out among the rest of the senators. Her hair is parted down the middle and her earrings give some shine to her face. Her eyes look  _ fierce _ . That’s the only way she can describe it. She supposes she should try to soften her face a bit to perhaps invite the people to buy a dance with her, but she doesn’t want to. 

She feels good. She feels powerful. 

Everyone is staring at her, possibly because of her ensemble, her confidence, or both. She feels like she can part seas, and is smug when people move out of her way to accommodate her dress.

Okay, so maybe this was worth it. 

The gala is already full swing with senators and the people dancing in the middle. The jazz-like music is enticing enough for people to stay on the sidelines for a bit, and for people to crowd in the middle for dancing. She does the former first, and heads to the bar in hopes of getting some liquid courage if she was going to survive the night. 

She jolts in her bar seat a bit when she realizes Ben isn’t here. Odd, considering he was her shadow all the time. He hadn’t said he would miss out on today, but she had a feeling he probably would want to skip out on an optional night. She felt a pang of disappointment as she scans the room, trying to point out his face. Was she disappointed Ben wasn’t coming, or that she had to endure the night alone? She shot back her drink quickly, hoping some emergency might come up to end this night early for her.

The dancing crowd had grown in size in the short amount of time it took Rose to finish her drink. She was able to catch a couple of newer senators already fulfilling their promise, dancing with people who paid to dance with them. She knows the playbook here. A dance with a senator would allow someone to whisper in their ear, an attempt to guide the person in power towards a certain way. Rose muffles a small laugh when she catches Avar Kriss, the most noble senator she’s met, practically swooning in the arms of a constituent whose hair is slicked back way too thick. 

In fact, most of the constituents are indeed a bit too off putting for her. A glance around the decorated room reveals it: Young men with too much gold and greed, eyeing the older senators. Old men eyeing the younger senators. Creepy women figuring out who could be easy prey. Her stomach churns when a balding older man catches her eye, smiling leeringly as he began his way towards her. Instinctively, Rose narrows her eyes at him and she’s never been more thankful for a smokey eye because the man’s eyes grow wide, and he walks away. 

So maybe she’ll raise no money. Oh well.

She goes up the grand staircase to escape the suffocating ballroom. Up top, there’s a hologram keeping track of the funds being raised by each senator. Her name shows a big fat zero next to it. Feeling a bit ashamed, she stops halfway and draws in a deep breath. 

She helped defeat a regime. She did not come this far to shy away from  _ dancing _ . 

Turning, she begins to descend the staircase when a figure catches her eye. 

They instantly lock eyes. He was probably already looking for her, making sure she wasn’t kidnapped or worse, drunk. She’s grateful for the staircase rail, holding her in place. 

Ben Solo in a tuxedo is not something she could have been prepared for.

He towers everyone else in the room. They’ve noticed him as well, because the swaying of bodies aren’t in rhythm anymore. He usually draws that type of attention, something Rose isn’t used to. She’s easy to hide. Ben evidently can’t.

Her steps increase in pace as she finishes descending down the stairs. He meets her at the bottom, arm extended out. His eyes never leave hers when she takes his arm and he guides her to the dance floor.

If she parted seas before, she now walks on water.

They make it to the middle where the other pairs are intimidated by their presence, giving them more than enough room to begin their dance. Rose is momentarily frozen in fear. She didn’t think she would get this far tonight, but Ben seems to pick up on her cue. He begins leading her slowly, allowing her feet to catch up with the tempo of the slow and smooth sounds. 

His scent is the first thing that engulfs her. Normally, she reaches just below his shoulder. Thanks to her pumps tonight, she was able to reach right by his bowtie. He smells faintly of roses and deep woods. It’s overwhelming enough to have her a bit weak in the knees, but sweet enough where she wants to be swimming in it.

She thinks she’s floating, the way he’s able to glide her across the floor. Chills go through her figure when the mostly likely expensive fabric touches her shoulder, and it encourages Ben to tug her closer. The silky fabric of his jacket feels tender against her exposed arms. Her hand is lost in his, and her cheeks flush when her eyes notice just how large his hands are.

Ben clears his throat.

“You look nice.” Rose glances up at him incredulously. His body language isn’t rigid, but there’s some part of him that tenses up with his admission. He turns her around elegantly, his body in tune with the slow music. She’s grateful to have just a second away from the heat radiating from his body. But the warmth between them grows more by the second, her heartbeat growing steadily along with it.

“It’s just a dress,” Rose dismisses. He doesn’t press it further, but Rose notices the way everyone is still staring at them. She catches the eye of a senator who narrows her eyes at the hologram at the top of the stairs. Rose turns her head and her brows raise to her hairline when she sees that the zero that was by her name is almost double the amount of the money the other senators have collectively raised.

She snaps her head back to Ben, who is only smirking at her.

“Looks like you won tonight.”

Judging by the looks that are being thrown her way, tinted with jealousy because of the money, her look, and maybe because of Ben, she doesn’t argue back this time.

*

_ Nice _ . He chides himself later that night as he’s taking off his bowtie. It wasn’t nearly descriptive enough.

He really meant to say beautiful.

**Author's Note:**

> Say hi to me on Twitter! @Linaxlight
> 
> If you like this, check out my other stuff? https://archiveofourown.org/users/domilesl


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